Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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