You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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