im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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