I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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