Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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