operation harelip BJ is a go
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
