yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
