can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize