i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
