With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
