You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
