I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
