so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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