I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
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