what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
