you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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