do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
