You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
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