Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
