I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Randomize
