My hair reeks of homosexuality.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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