First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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