I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize
