the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
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