You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
