The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize