but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
