And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
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I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
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I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up