I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize