i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Boobs speak an international language.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize