i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize
