i was rollin on her like bob the builder
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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