I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
