normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
The adults are the big ones right?
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Randomize
