I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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