I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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