god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
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You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
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Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
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