So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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