Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
