So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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