sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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