A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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