the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
