I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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