He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I need to sanitize my soul.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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