I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
