Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
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