If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
