Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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