Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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